Toxic positivity. What the heck is that and how could positivity ever be toxic? I have heard this term more recently lately and I completely get it I just never had words for it. Well, let’s get into it, shall we?!
There is such a thing as too much of a good thing, like literally. As we learn, grow, and expand our minds we may be inadvertently spilling out too much goodness. That is a strange notion, but please hear me out. Being positive in my opinion is super important as a coping mechanism and as a way to filter certain issues we face daily.
You’re fired!
When we get that call from a dear friend that says that they got fired from a job they loved, we sometimes give a knee-jerk response like, “Hey it’s their loss, it wasn’t meant to be anyway!” Well, sometimes that isn’t necessarily a good response especially right away. We may be accidentally shutting them down from feeling and expressing their emotions.
We have good intentions, right?! All we want to do is try to help others by giving them a good healthy dose of positivity. Do understand that always saying, “Good Vibes Only” could really be a bad thing sometimes. We need to afford ourselves and others around us the time to feel. After all, that’s what makes us human.
A way to put this into perspective is like this. When I was younger I used to build neon signs. The real ones! The ones that were glass tubes and had argon gas pumped into them to give them their very beautiful glow. When I started I was always super careful and constantly watched every corner as I was navigating moving through the warehouse with the very fragile glass.
Relate positivity to me walking through the warehouse with the fragile tube always being careful. At each corner, I would tense up and freak out that I would break the tube. Too much caution, just like too much positivity. Guess what? It broke 9 out of 10 times. But, why? I was being super careful as to not break it. Too much “positivity.”
One of the old-school guys in the warehouse told me, “Hey, don’t overthink it. Be careful but don’t be too careful or the tube will break.” It was just the information I needed to hear because after that I rarely ever broke tubes. Being positive is important, but it could be toxic.
The toxic part comes in when people overuse positive terms, sayings, and so on. Additionally, we could be masking our very own emotions by forcing a feeling that we may not necessarily be ready for. We need to afford ourselves the opportunity to feel. Processing is good too. But just like over-positivity we could end up processing too much. Find a healthy balance that works for you.
Overusing positive quotes can really make you seem to be disingenuous. A lot of times I have seen people who spill the stuff out left, right, and center. You take a closer look at their lives and it is in complete disarray. Like they are in turmoil and toxic positivity has taken over their lives. They aren’t even aware of it. Become self-aware.
Pictures donated by my lovely girl!
Conclusion
Be positive. Be yourself, but please try to not overdo it because you could be causing more harm than your original intention. Be human and try to find a healthy balance of positivity. Learn some cool quotes, but know that quotes are just words. Live by good actions.
Question
How are you today?
