Loneliness and being alone, peaceful, withdrawn, seems to be ever-present with many people these days. We are in a time where we are surrounded by so many humans all the time. Pretty much anywhere and everywhere you go you will be overwhelmed with the presence of these beings. Who the heck wants to be alone though, right?
Interestingly, over time it appears that many of us are slowly but surely closing up to others. I have many discussions with people who say they are fed up with being around the type of people who are always negative, that bad mouth other people, and are overall very superficial. Apparently, there isn’t a shortage of these types of individuals amongst us and that leads others to just seclude themselves to the refuge of their own environments and homes.
Trying to find clarity
My first reaction is, “well try to surround yourself with the ones that have the goodness you like.” But that is easier said than done. I always try to find the bright side of things to inspire myself and others around me. In my immediate environment, I too have discovered this and it seems to frustrate me. “Ok, that person isn’t very nice, time to move on.” “Well, that one isn’t nice either.”
Hmmm, what now? With these types of less than grand encounters with others, can leave you feeling somewhat unsure. Sure, everyone has their times that they can be negative and grumpy, but they come in waves. Not everything is peachy so we should take the good with the bad with those around us. My thought is if someone’s world is 60% negative then that’s what you’re more than likely to get. You could always lend an ear, who knows maybe they are just needing to vent.
We are avoiding others
With all the hustle and bustle throughout our days, we tend to just drive in the garage, close the door and that’s it till the next round. The more we do this avoidance the more we become hermits in our own world. When we close the door, we shut people out. Then we sit and veg in front of the tube, play on our devices, and before you know it the human interactions are gone.
Our experiences day in and day out with others, be it in our business world or in our personal world or both can weigh heavy on our overall happiness. This tends to reflect outward on others, so perhaps it’s not just because of other people. We need to get to the understanding that human interaction is the key. Good and healthy interactions of course.
We need the live and in color connections
But wait, I talk to people all the time and I have lots of friends! Facebook, Instagram, and so on are always chiming with messages for me. These virtual conversations aren’t what we need. We need the live and in color conversations. It is so much better when we can see and feel the emotions of others. The ability to step back in time with someone from a great story of when they grew up is amazing.
Now, I know that we aren’t all this way but how do the ones that have fruitful and healthy relationships do it? Could it be that some are in the wrong regions of the country or the globe. Finding commonalities can’t be that big of an undertaking right?
Well for myself I have found myself in a region that oddly I haven’t been able to adapt to. That’s crazy because I am the type that gets along anywhere. Hmmm.
For many, there is the belief that it takes too much effort to create and foster a relationship just to be let down. Well, that’s not a good way of thinking. You just have to get through the weeds to discover the ones that stand out as you do. We can’t project our negative past experiences with others on to new people. It’s just not fair to them or yourself.
Trying to find commonalities
For me personally, in the past five years being where I am, I haven’t discovered many people yet with the same commonalities as myself and that is perplexing to me. Previously living in Atlanta, Georgia for many years I for the most part had endless connections with others that shared similar and same passions in life.
Loneliness and being alone
In the area that I currently reside, it is mostly sports and beer. None of which I have any interest in. Nothing wrong with people that enjoy that but it’s not my thing. My thing is goodness, creativity, exotic cars, photography, and thriving!
I did have some challenges getting out and meeting people since within the time I have been in my location I had two surgeries that kept me down a bit. This is a good example of excuses by the way. Yes, I make some excuses from time to time but I am learning more and more every day.
The point of all this is that you can see how over time based on your world, loneliness, and being alone can cause you to slowly disconnect from others. Don’t let time go by with loneliness and the addiction to being peaceful and alone.
Conclusion
Being alone for such a long time with minimal interactions with others creates a hermit type of effect. The more time goes by the more we internalize and the more we could potentially withdraw from others. When you realize this, do your best to get some good healthy connections going again.
What are the best ways to communicate with others organically?
